What's Good 4 Da Goose
"What's good for the goose is good for the gander:" preFeminist saying, suggesting differences in gender are of little consequence. What happens when a pansexual, natal woman falls in love with a bisexual, transexual woman? Whatever it is, it sure ain't boring.
Thursday, December 02, 2004
email to the doctor
Doctor,
[Ma] asked that you not make any changes to her lower lip.While sedated, during surgery, she was so determined that you not modify it, that she struggled back to consciousness, to tell you not to change it. She didn't protest the cutting, the stapling, the suturing or anything else she remembers about the procedure--only that.
You told her you were evening it out.
She had a reason for asking you not to modify her lip. That reason was me.
[Ma] scheduled her procedures before she and I became intimately involved.
I asked her to ask you not to change it.
[Ma] told me you think symmetry is important to beauty. I disagreed. I said symmetry isn't real, isn't natural, and isn't idiosyncratic.
Doctor, even your own website shows the Mona Lisa: crooked smile, prominent brow, wide jaw, thin and low top lip. Some suggest the Mona Lisa is actually DaVinci's self portrait as a woman.
I loved that lower lip. I loved the crookedness of her grin. I loved it that only the right side of her face pouted.
[Ma] just sent me some jpegs of her recovery. That's not [Ma]'s lower lip, the lip I love to tug and flip with my finger. I know it's swollen, but it's also symmetrical.
[Ma] doesn't know I've written to you, but I'll tell her.
She says you told her most of the fat you've added would be reabsorbed eventually.
But I don't know if you did something to "balance" it out, and destroy its crookedness.
[Ma] made her plans with you before we were together.
I'm alone, waiting for her to recover at her sister's house enough to come home to me. I may have to spend the holidays alone, waiting for a different face to walk in the door.
That's going to be an adjustment.
I comforted myself with the thought that at least that silly, pouty lip would come back. Now, I know it won't.
I know you're an expert on facial reconstruction, and I respect and appreciate that. But, when a client expresses a desire to maintain a particular feature --even if, to you, it seems "flawed," -- perhaps it would be good to honor that, even if the client can't articulate why.
I'm hurt, and somewhat shocked, to know this irrevocable change has been made to my love.
[Ma] asked that you not make any changes to her lower lip.While sedated, during surgery, she was so determined that you not modify it, that she struggled back to consciousness, to tell you not to change it. She didn't protest the cutting, the stapling, the suturing or anything else she remembers about the procedure--only that.
You told her you were evening it out.
She had a reason for asking you not to modify her lip. That reason was me.
[Ma] scheduled her procedures before she and I became intimately involved.
I asked her to ask you not to change it.
[Ma] told me you think symmetry is important to beauty. I disagreed. I said symmetry isn't real, isn't natural, and isn't idiosyncratic.
Doctor, even your own website shows the Mona Lisa: crooked smile, prominent brow, wide jaw, thin and low top lip. Some suggest the Mona Lisa is actually DaVinci's self portrait as a woman.
I loved that lower lip. I loved the crookedness of her grin. I loved it that only the right side of her face pouted.
[Ma] just sent me some jpegs of her recovery. That's not [Ma]'s lower lip, the lip I love to tug and flip with my finger. I know it's swollen, but it's also symmetrical.
[Ma] doesn't know I've written to you, but I'll tell her.
She says you told her most of the fat you've added would be reabsorbed eventually.
But I don't know if you did something to "balance" it out, and destroy its crookedness.
[Ma] made her plans with you before we were together.
I'm alone, waiting for her to recover at her sister's house enough to come home to me. I may have to spend the holidays alone, waiting for a different face to walk in the door.
That's going to be an adjustment.
I comforted myself with the thought that at least that silly, pouty lip would come back. Now, I know it won't.
I know you're an expert on facial reconstruction, and I respect and appreciate that. But, when a client expresses a desire to maintain a particular feature --even if, to you, it seems "flawed," -- perhaps it would be good to honor that, even if the client can't articulate why.
I'm hurt, and somewhat shocked, to know this irrevocable change has been made to my love.
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